Obama's Traveling Medicine Show

" Welcome back my friends to the show that never ends
We're so glad you could attend, come inside, come inside
There behind a glass stands a real blade of grass
Be careful as you pass, move along, move along
Come inside, the show's about to start
Guaranteed to blow your head apart
Rest assured you'll get your money's worth
Greatest show in Heaven, Hell or Earth "
     
  -- Emerson Lake and Palmer
 
 
It wasn’t long ago that traveling medicine men drove their wagons from one small town to another, hawking remedies, elixirs and tonics to the hayseeds, rubes and hicks that were drawn to the colorful wagons like flies to dung. Those flimflam artists claimed that their concoctions, which were prepared while reciting mystical incantations under a full moon, could cure any disease from common cold to rheumatism. For the most part, the remedies consisted of ingredients that had little or no health benefit. Frequently the kick within the bottle was nothing more special than a large dose of grain alcohol. But regardless of the bottle’s contents, one of three things always happened to those who purchased and used the stuff:
 
          They got better;
 
          they got worse;
 
          or they died.
 
Then, no matter what the outcome, the medicine man was covered. If the patient got better, due to the natural healing ability of the human body, the medicine man took all the credit and enjoyed an increase in business as the patient purchased more of the medicine and positive word of mouth traveled across the countryside. If the patient got worse, the medicine man merely stated that the disease was worse than he originally thought, after which he sold the hapless patient more or, in some cases, additional equally useless mixtures to be used in conjunction with the original prescription. If the patient was unfortunate enough to die, the medicine man sadly shook his head, conjured up a few tears, and sighed, “If he had only come to me sooner.”
 
In January, 2009, Dr. Barak Obama brought his medicine show to Washington D.C. The hayseeds, rubes and hicks were a desperate American people seeking hope and change. The disease was an ailing economy and the “cure” was a $900 billion stimulus scheme.
 
Historically a recession, even a severe one, lasts on average about eight months to a year before the natural ability of a business-based economy to recover on its own kicks in. But Obama’s recovery is hampered by the very stimulus that he prescribed. Now it is becoming abundantly clear that the snake oil is not working. 
 
Had the economy improved, you can be sure that Obama would have given all the credit to the particular brand of elixir that he conjured up with mystical incantations under a full moon. But instead the patient began to get worse. Unemployment is rising like a fever beyond the projected eight percent ceiling toward ten percent and the stock market continues in the throws of severe fever tremors.
 
Early this week Obama took the second approach in the flimflam artist’s arsenal of scams. He sent his shill, Vice President Joe Biden, to announce that the patient’s disease was worse than they had thought. Biden then prescribed a larger dose of Obama’s elixir; additional stimulus. Combine that with a few other costly remedies, like cap and trade taxes, global warming solutions, green industry startups, and nationalized healthcare, and the patient is well on the way to running out of the funds with which to buy any additional cures.
 
Weakened by economic snake oil that couldn’t cure a hang nail, and out of the funds required to reinvest in business–based solutions that could actually bring our economy back to the fullness of health, the patient might die. Of course, if that happens Obama can always conjure up a few tears and say, “If only I had become President sooner.”

 

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Barack Obama